


Hands

by eerian_sadow



Series: Avalon [71]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, bring all your tissues, heavy on the hurt, mentions of child death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-10-27
Updated: 2008-10-27
Packaged: 2018-09-21 19:35:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9563381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eerian_sadow/pseuds/eerian_sadow
Summary: After an awful battle, Prowl and Jazz have a fight. That's not normal, that's notrightand now Jazz has to chase down his wayward mate to find out what happened.





	

**Author's Note:**

> for [](http://dark-daebereth.livejournal.com/profile)[dark_daebereth](http://dark-daebereth.livejournal.com/) who wanted some Prowl/Jazz answering the question of “Why is Jazz chasing Prowl down the road?” It…turned into angst. Horrible, tearing up kind of angst. And that’s very appropriate for my favorite Angst Queen. And I’m pretty sure that she won’t mind the way it slid into the Avalonverse.

He didn’t even know why they had started fighting. It wasn’t anything they had ever done before after a battle—and certainly not in front of the civilians they had been trying so desperately to save. In the past, the two of them had always kept their fighting carefully confined to the base, either in their quarters or one of their offices. Keeping personal business inside the base was a habit that was so ingrained in both of them that they rarely even talked about anything that wasn’t business on a battlefield.

Jazz had been as stunned as the other Autobots looked when Prowl laid into him, but it had been far too easy to respond in kind. He was hurting over the deaths of the human children in the bus Devastator had stepped on and he had wanted a target to redirect that hurt and fury toward. He was fairly sure that Prowl was doing the same—the tactician took it hard when children were killed.

That was what made it so hard to believe that he had even said the words that had sent his mate running away from him in a flash of transformation and screeching tires.

 _Those little girls would still be here if you had gotten off you aft and done something about Devastator._ The words echoed in his processor, determined to haunt him for as long as they could. Jazz stood frozen, shocked at his own insensitivity, and let the other mech drive away.

He might have been frozen forever if Sunstreaker hadn’t come up to him and punched him. “That was low, Jazz. Even for me. And now Bluestreak’s falling apart over there.”

Jazz didn’t turn to look at the young mech he and Prowl had adopted so long ago. He knew that Blue would most likely be collapsed in Sideswipe’s arms, wailing and trying to figure out what was wrong; the sniper had never taken it well when he and Prowl fought.

“Tell Prime I’ll be back soon,” Jazz said to the yellow Twin. Then he transformed and took off down the road after the tactician.

He had always known Prowl could get some speed out of his alt mode, but Jazz was fast enough that Prowl’s head start didn’t matter. He caught up to his mate easily and pulled up behind him close enough to touch. Prowl found an extra burst of speed somewhere and pulled away from him.

 _I’m sorry, Prowl,_ he commed.

Prowl didn’t reply. Jazz couldn’t help but feel hurt by that—the tactician had never snubbed him like that before, no matter how angry he was.

_Prowl, please. Can we talk about this like civilized mechs?_

The other mech continued to ignore him—and drive at speeds that were too high to be healthy.

_If you’re gonna drive so fast, at least turn on your lights. Ain’t safe for you or the humans like this._

Prowl still didn’t say anything, but he did turn on his lights and siren. That was relieving; Jazz didn’t have to worry about his logic processor having fallen offline on top of whatever else was bothering his mate.

They continued to drive—still faster than Jazz would have liked—and Prowl continued to stay silent. Jazz didn’t try to push for information; Prowl would tell him what was wrong eventually the way he always did. Until then, the saboteur would hang back a little and give the tactician a bit of space.

Jazz wondered if Prowl knew he was leading them back to the _Ark_.

The closer they came to the _Ark_ the more the roads began to curve and the harder it became to keep an eye on Prowl without using his sensors. Jazz was pretty sure that was how the tactician managed to take him by surprise as he came around a curve and slammed into his mate.

“Why won’t you leave me alone?!” Prowl shouted, holding tightly to Jazz’s sides as he spun out of control.

The saboteur screeched to a stop as soon as he regained control of himself. Prowl let go of him and slid to the ground.

“I love you too much to just let you go off and get yourself slagged because you’re angry.” Jazz took the opportunity to transform and pull his mate into his arms. “What happened back there, Prowl? Why were we fighting?”

Prowl put his arms around Jazz and clung to him like Bluestreak after one of his nightmares. “I don’t know. All I could see was Devastator stepping on that school bus and I just lost it. You were right; it was my fault.”

“No it wasn’t,” Jazz said softly. “I was wrong to say that. I’m not sure that any of us could have stopped him.”

“I could have distracted him long enough for the Twins to finish evacuating the children if I hadn’t been so concerned with trying not to shoot them myself.”

“And then those little girls might have died by your hand instead.” Jazz laid his head against Prowl’s. “You did everything you could for them. I’m sorry that I hurt you by saying otherwise.”

Prowl didn’t respond verbally—he simply held Jazz tighter. The saboteur could feel his mate’s guilt through their sparkbond and was pretty sure the other mech should have been a screaming mess, not so horribly silent. He just wished he knew why Prowl was feeling like this; two dead children couldn’t really account for it.

“Please talk to me, love. Tell me what else is wrong.”

Prowl shook his head. “I already know I’m being illogical. Please tell me you forgive me?”

Jazz couldn’t remember the last time the tactician sounded so vulnerable. The feeling made his spark ache. Fortunately, he would be able to tell his mate the truth—he’d forgiven the other mech the moment he’d made his hurtful accusation. “I forgive you, Prowl. I love you.”

Prowl’s guilt didn’t go away, but the tactician did relax into his arms. The saboteur was content to simply sit and hold the other mech until he was willing to talk.

The sun was setting when Prowl finally spoke. “I was looking at them when Devastator attacked the bus. One of the girls called out to me. She knew my name and was begging for my help and I couldn’t do anything, Jazz. I keep seeing this tiny had against the glass and hearing her shout and I can’t stop. She begged me for help and all I could do was watch her as she died.”

“Then she didn’t die alone,” Jazz said. “That’s something.”

“It’s not enough.”

“I know.”  



End file.
